Monday, May 2, 2016

#NIAW Bloggers Unite Conference~ Day 9

#NIAW Bloggers Unite Conference~ Day 9
Hosted by Miss Conception Coach

As one part of NIAW, I was asked to be part of a bloggers unite conference this week (thanks to @MissConceptionCoach- see web link above to go to her site/blog). Those of us participating wrote about different angles of infertility, and all pieces are also centered on the theme #StartAsking. I'll be sharing the posts from the other women each day, and one day mine will pop up as well. You can read them all here, on the link above, or at the featured blog itself (which will have a link at the bottom). 
Here's today's post, Day 9. This is the last day of the bloggers unite conference, btw. Thanks for tuning in!! :) I'm so happy to have been a part of this and to share each piece.

Colby and I married in April of 2011 and soon after decided we were ready for kids. At the beginning of 2012 after a conversation with my ob, she suggested we both get baseline tests done due to prior medical history. Just a few days after we both got tested, we received several phone calls, none of which were good. Most of my hormones were irregular hormones and an MRI revealed a tumor on my pituitary gland. In addition, Colby was diagnosed with azoospermia.
Our world came crashing down in those moments. While obviously motherhood isn’t the reason I got married, it was (and still is) a top priority for me. What would this mean for our future? We weren’t sure, but we immediately found ourselves crying out to the Lord (and clearly still are). We were referred to meet with two specialists: a urologist and a reproductive endocrinologist. They told us we had 0% chance of conceiving on our own, but gave us a slight chance if we pursued IVF. Besides a few more visits Colby had with the urologist, we haven’t been back to the doctor since.

Start Asking. This is the theme of this years National Infertility Awareness Week. I love that this theme promotes not only awareness, but it also provides education to those who are and are not going through infertility.
My encouragement to you today is to start asking your spouse. The most important thing when facing infertility is that you don’t lose sight of your marriage. As you begin doctors visits, tests, and maybe even procedures, it’s key to keep the communication lines open with one another.
Not only is this important during infertility, but what about before you are ready for kids. Have you asked your spouse how long you want to try before seeing a doctor? What about fertility treatments? Obviously it’s hard to discuss when you clearly hope nothing will be wrong, but it makes it even harder when you don’t even know what your diagnosis will be. Because of those unknowns, take time to discuss whether you are open to fertility treatments at all. What about if a donor is suggested? Will you freeze or donate your embryos? Will you pursue adoption before doing any of that?
The best thing you can do is ask. Ask to prepare. Ask to know. And ask because you care. Don’t just ask the medical questions, but ask the emotional and spiritual ones too. The best thing you can do is make sure you are prepared and make sure you are on the same page. No matter what happens, keep the communication open and strong between you and your spouse and never lose sight of the love that brought the two of you together.

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